Are You Trans* Enough?

It occurred to me, while waiting alone in a lounge at Heathrow airport to visit Moony, just how different things can be fore a trans* person.

I mean, there have always been social stereotypes for male and female bodied people, but society is a lot more lenient now, and girls can like Doctor Who, whereas boys can like whatever the hell they want because we live in a patriarchy, but if it’s feminine they’ll still be called gay. But then that’s not gender-based as much as mildly homophobic, sort of.

But the point is that beyond a few slurs, most people are now able to be who they are, now. But it’s different if you’re trans*.

People (mostly cis, but also sadly others in the LGBT* community) thing that if you’re a trans*woman or trans*man, you will always conform to the stereotype of your chosen gender and repel everything that is associated with your given gender.

This couldn’t be more wrong. I’ve had my nails painted by a mate a few weeks ago so it looked like a galaxy was on my hands, but this makes me no less male than somebody born male who has the same thing done to them.

Sure, it makes me look gay, but I was never going to be a straight kid.

I’ve had first hand experience of a woman who felt the need to apologise because she was wearing more masculine clothes than usual.

I’m borrowing a phrase from Chase (this is him, he's one of the team on trans*tastic and a wonderful guy) , but there is no strict way to be trans*-anything, and no such thing as being trans* enough.

Everybody’s path is different, and people – weather trans* identifying or otherwise, are entitled to be themselves and take an steps necessary to achieve a ground they are comfortable with.

If somebody, during transition, changes their mind about anything, or feels like they need to take a break, it does not mean they are de-transitioning. Even if they are taking a dew steps back, or only taking one step, like changing their name but nothing else, or take no steps other than a nickname and open preference, only that person can determine if they are trans*.

This isn’t directly aimed at anybody, just something that has been bothering me, and of course not everybody is like this in their views, but this is my space.

It’s more that the small percentage that are disrespectful of other’s journeys, they are loud enough to cause trouble and be the very fact that posts like this need to be written.